It's Been Such A Long Time, Don't You Think So, Baby?



The new single from The School, taken from upcoming album Loveless Unbeliever due out in May. We snagged ourselves an advance copy and can confirm we're loved up believers!

Waitin' For The (Opening) Night

What Makes Him Act So Bad

First Class Return

We know, we've been neglecting you. More content soon, including a review of the Saint Etienne-curated first day of the Moseley Folk Festival, but until then check out 'Dancing' by Sheffield's Standard Fare. It's a purdy, poignant choon that will appeal to fans of bands like Sky Larkin and The Dirty Mittens, and the promo resourcefully makes a virtue of the no-budget D-I-Y montage format.



Standard Fare are playing The Autumn Store in Birmingham in December. We should go dancing!

Top Mark

Wolverhampton Wanderers v West Ham United, Saturday August 15 2009, 3pm.

If we recall correctly this is the very first time we've watched our beloved West Ham United play the first game of the season in the flesh. Amidst rumours of rogue homefan hooligans looking to 're-introduce' themselves to the Premiership, we met up with Dave R, Basingstoke Paul, Brighton Ben and Jerry at The Royal Oak, a friendly hostelry about a mile from the station, the other side of the ringroad, to sup Guinness and soak up the sun in the convivial surroundings of the spacious beer garden.

A brisk stroll to the stadium saw us just about get inside the ground for kick-off, with the home support providing huge roars of support every time the newly-promoted Wolves came anywhere near the Hammers' penalty area. A fairly open, even game then took a dramatic twist when Irons midfield tyro Mark Noble was given all the time in the world by a ponderous home defence to pick a vicious, swerving, long-range shot past the despairing arms of Wayne Hennessy into the net to open the scoring.

The early deafening volume of the home support was instantaneously muted by this setback, a seeming mood of resignation enveloping the ground as the Hammers were unlucky not to press home further the advantage before Half-Time. There was a renewed sense of purpose when the Second Half started, however, but England goalkeeper Robert Green provided a stunning salvo of saves to puncture the enthusiasm before it even started.

The game continued, feeling as comfortable for the boisterous away fans as a 1-0 advantage ever can be, Collison missed a near-open goal to raise anxiety levels a little but what tension existed evaporated when central defender Matthew Upson appeared to rise effortlessly over the Wolves defence to nod a second goal halfway through the second period. The home side continued to press but with dissipating conviction, while the pace of Hammers sub Junior Stanislas unsettled the black-and-gold rearguard during the closing stages of the match.

In summary, so far so good for West Ham, with Zola and Clarke continuing to wring out every ounce of team spirit and cohesion from limited resources and a backdrop of continuing financial unease. Wolves will be disappointed at how quickly their belief and purpose slipped away after a promising opening, and will need to be sharper in both penalty areas to accumulate the points they need to secure Premiership survival.

Parallax Premiership Ratings: GREEN 8; Faubert 7, Collins 6, Upson 7, Ilunga 6 (Spector 4); Collison 6, Parker 6, Noble 8; Dyer 6 (Stanislas 7); Jiminez 7, Cole 6. Frank Nouble came on late for Cole, with little chance to register a mark.

Parallax Premiership Predictions

1. MANCHESTER UNITED

2. Chelsea
3. Arsenal
4. Liverpool

5. Everton
6. Manchester City
7. Tottenham Hotspur
8. Aston Villa
9. Blackburn Rovers
10. West Ham United
11. Sunderland
12. Wigan Athletic
13. Fulham
14. Stoke City
15. Bolton Wanderers
16. Wolverhampton Wanderers
17. Birmingham City

18. Portsmouth
19. Hull City
20. Burnley

Emerging From Our Shell

Apologies yet again for the slight gap in transmission. As a consequence there's something of a content jam so expect a gig review ketchup and linkdump in the next few days, as well as our annual Half-Term Report on the best albums released in the UK from January to June 2009.

In the meantime, continuing a recent (accidental) animal theme, enjoy the promo video of 'Turtle' by The Wind Whistles. Like the nature that seemingly informs their lyrical content, there's a slightly sinister undertow to the band's apparently straightforward surface, making their appeal nearer to anti-folk than twee.



If you like this, you might want to try their second album 'Animals Are People Too' which can be downloaded in full, legally, and for free*, from here. There's also whispers of a UK tour soon.

*Voluntary donations are encouraged, however.

Cling On

Who said you can't rely on Banks in a recession? Interpol vox Paul Banks's solo project Julien Plenti sees fruition with the release of debut album 'Skyscraper' on August 4, so this sneak peak of 'Cellophane' (complete with unofficial DIY montage) should ensure things are kept nice and fresh in the meantime.



OK, that's a wrap.

Gonna Do One Thing An' One Thing Only - Kill Nazis!


Inglourious Basterds

Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds (yes, that's really how they're spelling it) collect some Nazi scalps in cinemas from July 2009.

Gag Reel

Many people consider Chuck Palahniuk's Choke to be the weakest of his breakneck satires, although your contrary correspondent considers the opposite to be true. The forthcoming film adaptation may give both viewpoints food for thought when it's released Stateside late September, but meanwhile decide for yourselves if the borderline-work-safe trailer goes down a treat.

Psssst!

Could Bret Easton Ellis' least noted book provide the source material to the best screen adaptation of his work? Take a sneak peak at the trailer for The Informers below, which contains enough sex, drugs and rock'n'roll to make it NOT SAFE FOR WORK viewing.

The Eighth Annual Parallax View Premiership Predictions

1. CHELSEA
2. Manchester United
3. Arsenal
4. Liverpool

5. Portsmouth
6. Aston Villa
7. Tottenham Hotspur
8. Everton
9. Manchester City
10. Sunderland
11. Blackburn Rovers
12. Newcastle United
13. Middlesborough
14. Fulham
15. West Ham United
16. Wigan Athletic
17. West Bromwich Albion

18. Bolton Wanderers
19. Stoke City
20. Hull City

Talk your own balls in the comments box provided.

Manic Mondo

Because the internet would just be boryn without a bit of Robyn, we start off this Monday mini-mitherpiece with some self-styled self-regarding nonsense from the suddenly big and bossy Ms Wilder. Titbits include revelations about wandering through London with her blouse undone to the waist, but it's not just blogging ninja divas who suffer from wardrobe malfunctions, as Rihanna shows in this set of dubious-safety-for-work photos, proving that not even an umbrella (ella, ella, ella) could hide your blushes when it's that nippy out.

Raising our eyes from the gutters to the stars somewhat, Warren Ellis gives a sceptical glance back at speccy sci-fi boffin Joe 90 (via LMG) and Carl Hiassen's Lucky You is being adapted for the British stage. Elsewhere, various bods recall this year's Indietracks; On Dancefloors is a Bristol music blog with a funky attitude; In Pictures: Kate Bush is 50 and, remember Cardiff pop kids, Tell The Police The Truth.

Bloggers don't so much fade away as they do diversify, a case in point being Creepy Lesbo's Slash Media (NOT SAFE FOR WORK) in which she samples some of modern pop culture's gashtronomic delights. Skin Flicks is much more safe for work, although as he considers himself to be a very angry man and is found pleading for fallen women to be shown to him, maybe due caution should be shown after all.

Meanwhile, the undisputed star of Bristol's Dot-to-Dot, the inimitable Big Jeff, has MySpace.

And wherever else your browser points you, remember, Jesus Can See!

Closely Observed Pre-Trains

The Autumn Store Presents A Pre-Indietracks Special: The Smittens/The Zebras/Red Pony Clock, The Sunflower Lounge, off Queensway, Birmingham, Tuesday July 22 2008, 9.30pm.

Just get into the venue in time as Red Pony Clock start limbering up, a Tijuana-based octet who sound like a mix between Calexico and all-out chaos. Their van exploded on the way to the venue, but they seem in surprisingly good spirits about it, perhaps because on the plus-side it means you're not short of things to talk about between songs. You know those pictures that look like random dots but if you stare at them for long enough all of a sudden this brilliant 3-D image pops up before your eyes and makes sense of it all? Red Pony Clock are the sonic equivalent, as their seemingly ramshackle material develops into something clever, organic and fun to fully reward the patient, open-minded listener. There's still not enough dancing going on for the band's liking, though, until The Smittens' drummer Holly shows how it's done, leaping around like a frisky kitten ricocheting from furniture, to hugely engaging effect.

The Zebras aren't from South Yorkshire, they're from Rotherham - Rotherham, in Australia, that is, although Northern English influences like The Smiths and The Wedding Present would seem evident in a band with a much more immediate, accessible appeal to an indie crowd than Red Pony Clock. The Zebras are more than the sum of their influences, however, with songs that swoop and soar and stir, destined to go down well with Weddoes fans at this weekend's Indietracks, we feel. Their stage banter needs some work, however, maybe they need to emerge unscathed from a tour vehicle inferno to put some fire in their bellies?

With things running later than planned, your harassed hack needs to make a Last Train to Larksville exit halfway through the headline set from Burlington, Vermont's The Smittens, but what we see/hear is confident, breezy and tuneful, and fully in line with all the good things we've heard about/from them, and we'll look out for them next time they're jingling their jangle back on these shores.

All in all, another fine evening of high-quality indie gathering courtesy of those friendly folk from The Autumn Store!

All three bands featured will be playing at Indietracks this weekend (July 26-27, festival fact fans) in deepest Derbyshire.

Gruff Justice

Off out shortly to Brum for the rest of the day, but in the meantime let your eyes have a lunchtime feast over The Mercury Music Prize nominations, which contain few alarms or surprises, and include a couple of top contenders for album of the year to date in our upcoming Half Term Report (due by the weekend) in Neon Neon and Laura Marling. Radiohead and Burial are also worthy choices from 2007 for the MMP, with Burial and Laura Marling probably the best value bets, as genre contenders with broader appeal usually do well in these kind of competitions. A second successive win for a dance-orientated record may be risky, so my money's on Ms Marling for the folkin' good album 'Alas I Cannot Swim'.*

*Remember, pop punters, always gamble responsibly, and with money you can afford to lose.

Look Now

Nic Roeg has made his first major feature film for some years, a horror yarn based on a Fay Weldon story, starring Kelly Reilly, and re-uniting him with his Don't Look Now leading man Donald Sutherland. Initial reviews have been mixed, but bad Roeg is usually better than a lot of films made by lesser mortals at the top of their game, so perhaps best to judge for ourselves when Puffball is released in cinemas from July 18. In the meantime, here's the NOT WORKSAFE trailer to whet your appetites.

If You Can't Tell Your Friends From Your Enemies, It's Time To Go

After The Invasion and Flashbacks Of A Fool, Daniel Craig sure needs the new 007 flick to be a big hit.


Quantum Of Solace - Exclusive Trailer

Slip Hip Hooray!

Dead Kenny's family always wanted him to go to Oxford, but little did they suspect his first venture into the city wouldn't be to university but to go back to The School. The Cardiff popsters are playing at The Bullingdon Arms in two days time, to celebrate the release of their 'Let It Slip' ep this week on Elefant Records, of which we plan to pick up an autographed copy or we'll be waving our twelve-inch ruler around in disgust.

We've heard enough already to make it Parallax View Single Of The Week, however, the kicking intro, doo-wop backing vocals and handclaps making for a slick sonic delight not unlike Camera Obscura as produced by Phil Spector during one of his more coherent moments. Enjoy the video while you await the live review.

Peter, Bjorn And Gone

We begin with some sombre news that left us feeling flatter than Beirut as Victoria Bergsman has left The Concretes to concentrate on a solo career. We know that The Concretes are a solid unit containing multiple songwriters and vocalists, but Bergsman has a unique delivery and dry stage banter that will be difficult for the Swedes to replace. It does though kinda explain Bergsman's recent diversification - as well as singing on Peter Bjorn and John's recent PV Single Of The Week 'Young Folks', she's credited with providing Camera Obscura with haircuts on their latest long-player 'Let's Get Out Of This Country'...

Simon Sweeping The Nation went to the Truck Festival at the weekend but all we've got to show for it so far is this blurry but still fantastic photo of Dead Kenny's summer crush Emmy The Great in a seriously short skirt. It has to be said we'd have had difficulty finding our focus in the circumstances, too.

In theatre news, a new Terry Johnson play is always something of an event (eg. Insignificance; Hitchcock Blonde) so book early for a limited four-week run of Piano/Forte at the Royal Court Theatre. Sopranos star Alicia Witt and Kelly (Mrs Henderson Presents) Reilly head the cast.

This year's Big Brother we can take or leave, but what is certain is that contestant Imogen Thomas's ex-squeeze is a dastardly dick for releasing a home sex video purporting to feature the purrty Welsh miss in a rarebit of graphic action. But we admit we still looked at the NOT SAFE FOR WORK evidence (purely to identify the culprit concerned, 'course). Time and motion students can download the EXTREMELY UN-WORKSAFE full video from here.

Random Reading-bashing always provides an amusing diversion.

'Night, Warden.